What do you say when your child says “I hate diabetes!” ?
We posed this question to our group members on Facebook. Below is an exerpt from their conversation.
Andrea: I agree with her and tell her I hate it too. It assure her that it’s ok to hate it, but that we still have to keep fighting.
Robin: I give her an extra hug and tell her “I hate it too.”
Sherry: I agree…IT SUCKS..THE WHOLE THING SUCKS… And that’s the only time he is allowed to use that word. We tell him we don’t know why he got it. Sometimes we don’t know the answer.
Kim: I agree with him and tell him I hate it too. It’s understandable that he would feel this way as I feel this way a lot, and I don’t have it.
Allyson: I agree with my daughter and say I hate it too. And inside my heart breaks over and over. I tell her what Nick Jonas said – that after you get past the “why me’s” you will think “why not me” and that maybe there’s a reason she has this disease. Maybe she will become a researcher that finds the cure.
Krystal: I absolutely agree with them. As a parent, that’s difficult because we want to fix things for them. Then the reality of diabetes hits. Truly, life itself can be very difficult, and diabetes can teach them that at an early age. It can also help them be more sensitive to other people.
Lisa: I cry inside when he tells me that he hates his pump and can’t take it anymore. I keep saying “I know. Mommy is here for you.” I let him vent and try not to take anything personal, especially when he tells me I’m fired after changing his site!
Tara: I tell my son (14) that I hate it too. I also tell him that his diabetes has changed many lives, and he has made a difference in may lives. Although we hate diabetes, we still have to take care of it every day. We take it one day at a time.
Jeff: I don’t know that he has ever said that, but if he did I would say, “I hate having it also.”
Chantal: My son is 7. He never told me he hates it, but a couple of days ago he told me in the morning that before he went to sleep the night before he had a wish that he wasn’t diabetic anymore...that life was the way it was before. I had tears in my eyes and told him that he’s probably going to have to live with it for the rest of his life. He answered me “It’s not fun…wishes don’t work.”
Stacy: Tell him it’s okay to be mad about it. Then I make sure he knows that we are here fighting with him and taking the best care of him that we can...not just his parents, but his brother too. We pray for a cure all the time.
Cathy: We agree. My son was 9 when he was diagnosed in 2008. Only one time he said that he didn’t want diabetes anymore. I felt horrible because I understand. But he knows that I really don’t know what it’s like to have diabetes. Thank god I have a friend with an older son who has diabetes, and the two send e-mails back and forth. It means the world to my son.
Jennifer: Until we walk in their shoes, it’s hard for them to understand. I keep repeating “I hate it,” or “I would give my right arm,” or “Let’s take care of you so that we’re ready for the cure.” She still looks at me like I have 10 heads (she’s a teenager!). But I still keep saying it whenever she gets down.
Christina: My son was 5 when he was diagnosed. He asked me when his shots were going to go away. Then he asked me how he got diabetes. I said, “It was in your genes,” and he said, “I’m never wearing jeans again!” That moment plays over and over in my head. Sometimes it makes me smile, and sometimes it makes me cry. I hate it too.
Melissa: I listen to her vent her frustration at the time and find out what caused her to say it again. Normally by the time we’re done talking I remind her how strong she is. I, like most parents, hate it too, but need to stay strong to empower her to stay strong.
Michelle: I’d tell them what my doctor told me when I was diagnosed. Diabetes can be a blessing because you have to be vigilant and proactive about your health every day. We have the ability to be healthier than most people.
Scott: Yes diabetes stinks. But you’re going to be healthier than a lot of people because you will be in touch with what is going on in your body. Also, life is full of challenges, and you are either getting all of yours out of the way now, or they’re making you stronger to handle anything else that life can throw at you.
Wendy: Jeremy hasn’t said it in a long time, but when first diagnosed he’d say “I hate diabetes but I’m really good at it!” And he is. We’ve told him he has a very special purpose in life and can’t wait to see what it is. Someday he’ll turn this curse into a blessing.